Questions I Often Ask Myself

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What if...

• We could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out three sizes smaller?

• We could vaccum the fat out of our bellies and inject it into our butts? 

•  We could donate part of our DDD+ breasts to people that are not happy with their B cups? 

•  Healthy fruits and vegetables were just as cheap as Value Meals?

These are just four of the many questions that occur to me on a regular basis.  I guess if the first three things were possible, we wouldn't need number four. Of course if I could afford to eat right everyday I wouldn't get all of these supersized body parts that I want to shrink or donate to the less fortunate.

I also wish I could wiggle my nose like Bewitched and instantly have the body that I want.  Now that would be awesome.  I would also transport myself places so I won't have to deal with traffic, but that's another story.